Narcissists-Using Lies to Invent Their Truth

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Narcissists are compulsive liars----they can't help themselves. This is not an excuse for their abominable behavior. It is part of their psychopathology. Narcissists spend their lives in a state of delusion, a world of their making. They find others to share this delusion with them. If they are highly successful they have no difficulty finding those who are willing to "play with them" and share their lifestyles. At the core of it, the narcissist is a very small petulant child who has major tantrums if he doesn't get everything he wants.

One of the chief ways the narcissist reaches his goals is through lying---overt and covert lies. He/she often bad mouths others, makes efforts to destroy their characters and  professional status to move themselves foreword up the ladder. They have no compunctions about lying to everyone. They have clever concocted stories for each person in their inner circle and for the world at large. They lie to their spouses all of the time, to their children---promising them they will spend time with them and then making excuses at the last minute. Narcissists never show up for their children unless it is the favorite golden child that they have picked to be their alter ego.  They are very keen at inventing "truths"---intricate stories out of whole cloth. People believe them, even highly sophisticated individuals who should know better. It is the charm and magnetism that camouflages their perfidy every time. Once the narcissist has established power in the world he continues with his lies. He says the opposite of what he does. He promises constantly and never honors these proclamations.  He knows that he can create his own reality and if this involves ripping people off for millions of dollars over and over again, or destroying the lives of his children because he was neglectful and cruel, causing so much stress that his spouse becomes very ill----none of this matters. He faces those who confront  his lying with more lies. And this works for the high and mighty these days. We live in a highly narcissistic age where these people are running most of the show. Learn everything you can about the narcissistic personality disorder. Protect yourself from these highly disturbed predatory individuals. Lead your own life, using your many creative gifts. Visit my website: thenarcissistinyourlife.com

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation: United States and International
Book: Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life
Buy the book: amazon.com and amazon kindle edition
Email: lmlphd@thenarcissistinyourlife.com
 

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Comments

  • 4/23/2011 10:42 AM cheryl wrote:
    I was devastated when I was affirmed of my mothers lying. I was old enough to know better and didn't have anyone to express the emormity of what I felt. Now I do, thanks to you. This website has been so helpful in understanding why traditional therapy hasn't worked for me. It eases my loss of a normal life. When I saw how she was twisting the truth, many other behaviors made sense. I can't prove them, however, so I remain guilty. My therapist doesn't understand, and neither do I, why I can't change my self image of bad child in spite of all the traditiional behavior modifiers.
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  • 4/28/2011 12:14 PM CarolSue wrote:
    This blog is so true and informative. My spouse is a chronic liar. He says the opposite of what he does and fabricates stories to make himself look good. It makes me crazy. His few friends (he is in a position of power), believe him at the beginning and soon learn he is deceitful. I feel trapped, kids are grown and he is very self-serving. I have learned a lot by reading your blogs. Thank you!. CarolSue
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