Narcissistic Mother's Abuse-Making Children Their Servants
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Narcissistic mothers don't give a damn about their children. They use their children to enhance their personal image. Children of narcissistic mothers are treated like abused unpaid servants in their own homes. I have communicated with many adult children who have miraculously survived the narcissistic mother wars. Many have benefited from excellent psychotherapy. Others have found healing through different spiritual modalities. Congratulations and a big hug to everyone who has survived and prevailed over their narcissistic mothers and their narcissistic families. Visit my website: www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation
Email: lmlphd@thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Posted by LindaMartinezLewi at 3/24/2010 11:50 AM 
Categories: self help, narcissism, mental health, interpersonal relationships
Tags: psychotherapy children abused children exploited narcissistic mothers contact with your soul
Categories: self help, narcissism, mental health, interpersonal relationships
Tags: psychotherapy children abused children exploited narcissistic mothers contact with your soul
I was watching the Disney movie, "Snow White," the classic version, on HDTV the other night. It brought back memories of my childhood.
I remember my narcissistic mother teaching me to sew. Not so that I could experience fashion, but so that I could make the dowdy patterns of clothes that she picked out and be the homely and frumpy teen she wanted me to be.
Not only did I have to wear my homemade clothes to school, I had to wear plastic shoes from the cheap store that rubbed blisters on my feet, while my narcissistic mother was taken to the expensive shoe store by my enabling father and fitted for soft leather shoes. The excuse given-- "the children grow so fast, it's not worth spending money on their feet."
I set the table. I cleared the dishes. I helped mother tidy the house. And in my spare time, I had to entertain myself, mostly by reading. My mother was an artist, and she spent hours in her art studio (in our home) painting, while I was expected to find something else to do.
A scullery maid? You guessed it. She still wants me in this role to this very day. Now that she's elderly, I'm to wait on her hand and foot. Only I don't. Not anymore. Fortunately, she's a woman of means and can hire others to wait on her. Very empowering-- to know you are no longer a servant. Martin Luther King said it well-- "Free at last! Free at last! Thank God, I'm free at last!" --Donna
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The perfectionist narcissist ensures that her children do all her cleaning duties upon her rigid inflexible timetable so that the N Mother can spend hours upon hours in the bathroom painting on her mask in her ever so large mirror with lights all around it - like a stage show makeup mirror - so she can attend ‘another’ socialite dinner whilst leaving the children at home alone again, weekend after weekend. The 'guests' (not ours) bathroom grout between the small 'miniscule' tiles had to be scrubbed with a toothbrush every Saturday. The size of the bathroom resembled a swimming pool to us small children. To this day - I can not stand the sound of a hair dryer!
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