Narcissists Choose Borderline Spouses
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Narcissists choose spouses, not because they love them but because they can exploit these individuals. Narcissists often marry individuals who suffer from borderline personality disorder. The borderline suffers from a severe fear of abandonment and has problems with psychological boundaries. Borderline disorders are emotionally dependent and willing to serve the narcissist in all of his/her needs and desires. The borderline spouses is coldly exploited by the narcissist and will eventually be discarded by him.
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Posted by LindaMartinezLewi at 12/5/2009 3:18 PM 
Categories: self help,narcissism,marriage,mental health,narcissists,borderline personalities
Tags: fear of abandoment borderline personality servants to narcissist
Categories: self help,narcissism,marriage,mental health,narcissists,borderline personalities
Tags: fear of abandoment borderline personality servants to narcissist
This is why my relationship with a covert Narcissist lasted so long... Because when we got together at the age of 21, I had huge abandonnment issues, stemming from an unstable childhood and my need to leave home and experience a free life. (Though I really do love my family and we have healed a lot of our stuff.) Throughout the relationship the CN played on my abandonnment issues and it was so painful. In the last 2 years I worked on my issues a lot and recognized that I wanted to have a functional relationship in which we were equal partners. So the more that I tried to bring that up to him (I hadn't put together the pieces that he was a CN at the time), the more he passive aggressively rebelled. That resistance really helped me to get over my abandonnment issues, because I was more interested in a working relationshp rather than having him specifically in my life. I think he felt he was losing control and then abandonned me with 2 days notice. He is already living with another woman that he met before he left me. I am greatful to have worked out my abandonnment issues and now I love myself and don't need to emotionally depend on anyone for my happiness.
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