Narcissistic Sons-Narcissistic Mothers

Some narcissistic mothers fixate on their son as a golden child and a psychological partner. The son of the narcissist is adored by the mother. Although there is no actual incestuous interaction between mother and son, the narcissistic mother can be provocative and psychologically seductive with this child. Learning from early childhood that he is the prince of the household, he feels superior and self entitled to do whatever he wants. The father is out of the picture and takes no significant role in the child's development. The narcissistic mother has no interest in her spouse. The focus is on her special boy: his talents, charm, brilliance and superiority to everyone else.  Early on the mother communicates to her son that he has no limits and is perfect. This boy knows from the time that he is very young that he is golden---adored and revered by his mother. The narcissistic mother often raises a narcissistic son, an individual she can turn to for validation and a special person on whom she can attach her grandiose dreams of worldly success and power.

Mother's adoration and psychological fusion come at a weighty price. Narcissistic sons of narcissistic mothers have great difficulty becoming real men. Mother has manipulated her child as an adored object. As a result the narcissistic son cannot have emotionally and psychologically intimate relationships with women. Many of these male narcissists detest women and are frightened of being emasculated by them. This is a painful psychological remnant of growing up being suffocated by mother and not allowed to develop a separate identity as a man. Although these narcissistic man can appear to be normal with spouses and families, they are going only through the motions, creating and sustaining an idealized image of  spouse and father. Beneath the elaborate facade, the narcissistic son remains trapped in the psychological strangle hold of his narcissistic mother whom he now treats with cold contempt. Visit my website:www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com

Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
Telephone Consultation
Email:lmlphd@gmail.com
 

What did you think of this article?




Trackbacks
  • No trackbacks exist for this post.
Comments

  • 6/8/2009 11:20 PM wrote:
    Dr. Linda, I want to tell you how much I appreciate reading this blog entry today. I am 72 years old and am an "escapee" from my physically and controlling husband for 7 years. I've spent the last 7 years learning all I can about narcissism (and sociopathy.) This is the FIRST time I made the connection of my ex-spouse with his mother. I spent about 2 hours tonight journeling my memories of what I had observed about them. For the FIRST time, I could make sense of the patterns, that I "knew" but didn't. THANK YOU for this insight to put some more pieces of the puzzle together. I truly am grateful!
    Reply to this
  • 7/15/2009 3:03 AM Elizabeth wrote:
    Dr. Linda,
    You are right on target. I am 55 years old and an escapee of my family of origin, that was headed by a narcissist mother and her son. He was not anything special but in her mind and therefore the mind of the family, he was above it all...just like her. He was cruel, a liar and got away with criminal activity, again, just like her. I was the scapegoated child. I think the most profound thing that my father ( when he was allowed to speak) said to me was: "I know what both of them were doing to you. But, I couldn't do anything about it. I had to watch out for myself."
    Goldenboy got married and continued the reign of terror in his own home. The mental and physical abuse of his wife was constant although they acted like they were the perfect couple on the outside. His domination over her was indicative of a very insecure man with an axe to grind against women thanks to dear old mom. She was not allowed a car or to go out without him. Mother refused to believe he was doing this to his wife and deemed her "nothing but a liar". So, it goes on.
    I wish that the symptoms of this horrible disorder could be addressed in school, very much like parental pysical abuse is discussed and warned about. Yes, narcissist mothers will put on their game face and deny any wrongdoing to school authorities (no surprise there) and tell them what a horrible time they are having with a child. But, that in itself should be the giveaway especially if the child shows no such behavior in school. At least these children would not only have a safehaven but it would put the mother in check. It may save both the sons and daughters from some measure of the hell the mother has raised them to either practice or endure for the rest of their lives.
    Reply to this
  • 10/10/2010 11:13 AM Rebecca wrote:
    Hi, I have found out that my ex was Narcissitic. I have done 7 years therapy as my family is so dysfunctional. My mother is also Narcissitic of the Destructive kind. I also did a partial Psychotheary diploma. I only found out my ex was Narcissitic at the end after we broke up, as we shared a house out of convienence. I saw him re-start a relationship, and saw him totally manipulate this new woman. It was astounding. When we went out he told me that his mother had confided in him constantly from his childhood. I new enough to know that she had made him her, "surrogate husband". No sex, as it says above blog, but the husband was totally left out. I can now see the pattern. The total charm to woo me, suck me in, he probably lied and conned me as I have seen with this new woman. (he started a new relationship back in NZ while still here in Aust, and faliled to let her know he was living with his ex AND in fact led her to beleive that he was in a share house with flatmates!! S meaning more than two. He also told her that he had been on his own for 5 years, the same as she had. The mirroing had begun!!! Its stunned me, that I had entered unknowingly into another relationship with a man with this condition. Everything I have read on emasculated men, that had N mums, and are N too, made sense. The charmingness I was for ever looking for as after 6 months it was gone. Instead I was left with a boy, with a baby voice, who was not very good at taking care of himself. He hated being alone, I ended up this responsible person like his mum. He then in turn was critical, and cold, and purposely refused me sex and other intamcays I know now, in his way to control me. To me as much as I loved him, the sex was always not quite right, like he was in his own fantasy and could not really connect. The relationship got worse and not better. No bond was formed after he got me where he wanted me. I could go on an on, but thats enough. I was stunned that I had this man in my life for 3 years. I will never go for a man like that again. (fell in love in a week). I will enjoy the full 3 months and longer in making freinds!!! Yes friends, meaning that I also get to receive something too, in my next relationship. thanks.
    Reply to this
  • 10/11/2010 4:17 AM Lynne wrote:
    It's astonding that there is NEVER a change in the scenerio. The details and outcome are always the same. As a woman also raised by an Nmom, where I was the scapegoat, it is so easy to fall for the charm of a Narcissist. We never experienced the "charm" aspect of it personally. We saw Nmom play it out on others and wish she would be that nice to us. Therefore, when it came along, we fall for it hook-line-and-sinker. Instead of escaping the abuse, we end up adding to it by contributing an Nhusband, Nmother-in-law to Nmom.
    My ex and his mother where extremely seductive and sexual together. I found out they even took bubble baths together in a candlelit bathroom. She would call him at any hour to "come over and visit" usually after 10pm. He would run without question. My divorce from this "thing" took 6 years to get through. They were out to destroy me financially.
    Fast forward 10 years: My Nmom is dead, the exNmother-in-law is dead, the ex has "charmed" another woman and is using her ( and her money) and I have left the state, living 1,500 miles away with my new husband who I truly love and who loves and understands me. We ARE best friends and perfect life mates.
    My advice: Know yourself and who you are...not what you were told you were by liars for decades. Determine what you want from your life and where you can contribute. I have found being a positive contributor to life and others works wonders. Last, don't be in a hurry to find another mate. Give yourself time to become strong again in who you really are. It will happen if it's right. If it's not, rest assured, you will feel it in your gut. Best part: You won't be fooled again.
    Peace, Wisdom and Love to You
    Reply to this
    1. 12/18/2010 5:21 AM Niki wrote:
      My abusive Nmum died last January, unfortunately she was adopted and her adoptive mother was cruel to her but she brought me and brother up with so much abuse, now I am 45 I thank God I haven't end up insane. I was the scapegoat too, still cry for all the abuse she has given me, I was scared of her and my brother, both scared the life out of me but here I am back on my feet, getting some therapy finally to learn to love myself at the age of 45!
      I haven't achieved anything in my life so far, do not have any kids, luckily I managed to have some good friends finally the last few years because that also seemed a bit of a difficult task.
      My choice of men were also bad, most of them had many problems themselves, the last boyfriend I had was quite cruel to me. I am single now and getting on with my life and my work, hopefully I am going to start getting better, will stay single till I feel strong and most important of all to learn to love myself because my mum didn't love me and as we know if you don't receive love you can give love. I sometime believe we are here to learn this very difficult lesson, to learn to Love, it's all about that.
      Reply to this
    2. 2/8/2011 1:47 PM Henry wrote:
      Good advice. 52 yr old Son of Nmum.RECENT SHOCKING DISCOVERY.
      Take time to be strong, sadly distance or death seems the only medicine.
      Some/all of us have developed lot's of altruism, empathy, and capacity to love and be loved.
      I think now that I am free from Nmum , more and more happiness will grow.
      I AM NOT ALONE--- thank you all
      Henry---UK.
      Reply to this
      1. 9/22/2011 6:54 AM Dahir wrote:
        Henry! I share with you this shockikng discovery. I am 36 and i have just discovered that my mum is a narcissist. I am not alone and it's the begining of the begining. Thanks for sharing.
        Dahir -UK
        Reply to this
  • 12/12/2010 5:50 PM Niki wrote:
    My mother was adopted at the age of three. Her adoptive mother was very cruel to her and my mum was very hurt by that and of course by the fact that she never found out who was her biological mother.
    My mum had two me and my brother, her marriage didn't last and we ended up being raised by her and only as my father was pretty much out of the picture, had a tiny role play in our lives. My mother was cruel, very abusive and constantly demanding. She would start a vicious argument out of something very small, I would be upset and tearful but she wouldn't feel and empathy for me at all. My brother was raised as the Golden child and I took all the blame for almost everything. I was verbally abused by both of them and physically abused by my brother, my father and sometimes by my mother also. My brother broke my nose on a fight, my teeth, my finger and has caused bruises to other parts of body too. My mother would never protect me to save me from my brother's abuse but instead would tell me that it was mainly my fault for the pain he caused on me. However, I loved my mum very much and couldn't escape from her behavior and craved for her love all my life. At the age of 29 I moved to another country to keep my distance from them but I kept in touch and saw them at least twice or even three times a year. Nothing changed, the same thing, the same abusive behavior, sometimes worse because my mum used the fact that I left and I abandoned her and sometimes the punishment on my visits was really a lot worse than anyone would expected. She would do anything to stop me of seeing my friends and constantly sabotaged my realionships with female friends, stangely enough didn't do that with my boyfriends hardly at all but she sabotaged all my brother's relationships with other women to a point where were completely dead/finished. Of course she would blame the other women for finishing the relationship with my brother and never herself or my brother for his behavior.
    7 years ago my brother decided not to speak to her again after a massive conflict they had about his new relationship with an older woman that my mom found revolting as usual and didn't speak again till my mother got very ill and I was asked by her to send him a letter and let him know that she wanted to see him. I spent my last 7 years trying to support my mothers feelings about my brother's absence and constantly trying to do things for her to make her feel better but unfortunately all my attempts were trashed. She carried on abusing me and carried on being cruel but I had no choice I was feeling contantltly guilty if I wasn't doing what she wanted me to do. I managed to bring my brother back just 2 1/2 months before she died and saw each other for a few times. My mother to panish him for not talking to her the last seven years she had write him off and I tried several times to tell her that this this so cruel and best to change it but she didn't. My brother now believes that it was all my fault...
    Reply to this
    1. 2/17/2011 7:44 AM Lynne wrote:
      I'm amazed that your mother wrote off the Golden Child. It's usually the other way around: The scapegoat is written off in order to publically/legally declare the scapegoat to be at fault for the sins of the Nmom and the Golden Child.
      Nmom is forever playing one child against the other(s). It's how she kept her control over the Golden Child. If my mother was dissatisfied with her Golden child, for not obeying, she would turn her "loving" attention toward me. This infuriated the GC, I got beaten up by him and he would be returned to his throne. Since you were far away and out of the picture when your GC disobeyed, she turned the tables on him by rewarding you.
      One way or the other, it is a very sick and disturbing life. I'm happy you got what you did in the end. But, I'm sure you will agree, there is not enough money or material goods to recieve that will ever be compensation for what you had to endure from her and your brother for your entire life.
      Reply to this
      1. 2/20/2011 12:24 PM Niki wrote:
        Dear Lynne,
        This is exactly what happened! My mother rewarded me; she did this deliberately to infuriate my brother, her Golden child. She played this game behind my back and behind his back if you like so she can drive him insane and fill his mind with hate toward me. I loved her so much till the day she died and I am really glad I had the chance to tell her how much I craved her love all my life. I told her this when she got very ill when I knew, I sensed that she will not make it.
        Her two best friends and their children are now against me because they think I should do the right thing and get my act together, sell my property and give him money as my mom was not fair on him and I SHOULD BE THE ONE to sort this out but I am totally fed up with being the good one and the one who has to sort out all the issues that my mom created.
        The fact that my brother thinks that this is my entire fault is making me feel sick; how typical is this? I tried all my life to connect with him and all I got is hate!
        But this is what my mom played all her life! She played one child against the other like you said, typical of her! How can you possibly see any love growing between two siblings when the mother is behaving that way? It is impossible, however, I tried for several years to create some kind of relationship with him but I failed because their relationship was so powerful, took over the household completely and there was no room for me what so ever!
        The story goes on ... even now she is dead! She left me a letter saying how much money I should give my brother now she’s gone and that I SHOULD SHORT THIS OUT as soon as possible!
        She continues saying: ‘I know what I am asking you to do is very difficult but I WANT YOU TO BE BRAVE AND DO IT!’
        She probably felt guilty that’s why left this letter, I will never know how her mind worked, she still remains a big mystery to me and I centrality feel very strange towards all this and extremely hurt by it.
        She is dead and is still trying to control my life which is unbelievable! She is dead and plays on guilt trips still by saying that I should follow her instructions and follow her last wishes!
        My brother has sent me threatening letters saying that he is going to take me to court but he has now finally stopped.
        By law he cannot do very much and he knows that.
        I am doing some therapy to find some peace also a solution to this, it is all so disturbing but as I am reading your story and many other people’s stories I am not feeling so alone anymore!
        Thank you for your reply, I very much appreciated! I wish you all the best of luck in finding some peace in your life too!
        Reply to this
  • 12/24/2010 11:25 PM Menelik Charles wrote:
    @ Linda,

    a wonderfully, crisp, enlightening article, and with some heart-wrenching responses. Maybe some of you guys might seriously consider reading works by the late therapist, Alice Miller. She so much empathises with the inner child.

    Menelik
    London
    Reply to this
  • 2/14/2011 11:41 AM Huddos wrote:
    I am a 39 year old woman who just recently, for the very first time, realized that my mother (most likely a narcissist) raised my narcissist brother-the GOLDEN CHILD. Our parents have passed away, as well as a narcissistic step-mom as well. I have always been very rebellious, was always an individual, and always had very close bonds with friends, but my home life was terrifying to me. I was always very confused as to why I did not feel comfortable around my family. I blamed myself a lot. Yet, I ended up in the hospital once and almost died (murder) from my brother. I protected him and told no one what he did for years. It was never discussed again. I cant believe I have turned out as well as I have. Being the scape goat is way better than being the golden child. We get to move on and be ourselves guilt free, as long as we stay strong, set boundaries, and seek positive self-esteem. The new awareness of my family dynamic answers so many questions. And therapy has been very empowering. Recently I spent time with my brother and he sent me into a whirlwind of horrible memories of my childhood. It was then that I sought counseling and realized that he is an abusive narcissist and always was. WOW. So now I avoid him, for it seems that I have made choices, for the most part, that do not put me in relationships or situations that cause such intense triggers. He's out and good people are in. He has tried to reach out to me in really bizarre emails and it hurts me but I read posts like these and realize I am not alone and get back to my own life! Thanks for reading!
    Reply to this
  • 5/13/2011 8:52 AM John wrote:
    My Mother was a malignant narcissist . She is now dear . I am in my 60's . Life nearly over and it has been a wasted life for the most part Such a damaging woamn she was . I am still drawn to that same type of dominating controlling emasculating woman as she was . Probably because I feel no normal woman would want me . I know she set it up that way . That I was a worthless male but becasue she loved me so much she would always be there when no one else would . Thats how it plays out in my mind anyway
    . A friend told me back in 1975 that he believed my mother set me up to fail . Great info . I fall in to the trap . I dont know how to get out
    Reply to this
    1. 11/17/2011 12:51 PM Jean wrote:
      well your friend is not a friend, forget him. you are the subject of your life: the main actor, you can still change it and be happy. go to psychotherapy or psychoanalyst (to a good one) to meet the subject of your life: he is inside you. a good analysis can make you reach the parts of your inner body that your mother probably emasculated by ambivalent behaviour when you were a child. you can reconquer you masculinity, your inner strenght as a man. I know what I'm talking about. my mother was, still is a narcissistic pervert, seductive and not loving to me who was the scapegoat (my brother being the golden child but i tend to see him as the unlucky one even he has everything when i have to fight so much to reach inner strenght and happiness). your life can still be changed
      Reply to this
  • 5/20/2011 8:09 AM Marianne wrote:
    John,
    I am sorry to hear of your situation. Moreover, I am sorry you feel as if all is lost. I am in my late 50's and came to realize the same as you not too long ago. We not only had controlling mothers, we had mothers who felt our lives should be in total subservience to her. I was the scapegoat and was told, almost weekly, that I was nothing and nobody. I made bad decisions to get away from her which resulted in more pain for most of my life. Okay, here's the good news: Time to find out who you really are and what you are meant to be. No, it's not too late. Just take your time, take little steps and don't be hard on yourself if you make a mistake. It's going to be scary for awhile and I hope you find a great therapist to work along with you. I am free for the first time in my life; traveling and living in different parts of the country, meeting new people and going to bed each night knowing I did my best and had a great day. I began to count my blessings instead of thinking I had none. You are not responsible for what your mother was or did to you. You are responsible for your own happiness. Take that first step and you'll be running at full speed before you know it.
    Best of Luck! You CAN do it!!
    Reply to this
  • 7/28/2011 7:10 AM Sherra wrote:
    I have just left my husband after 4 years. I was a normal, confident woman at the beginning of the relationship but 4 years later I had turned into a nothing! I didn't realize he was a narcissist until I started reading about it afterward. I saw the signs of an N on a website and was surprised it didn't include a picture of him. He threatened to kick me out of the house at least 8 times and it was always over something small. He kept saying that I never let him do what he wanted to do, yet he could never come up with an example, ever! He became enraged if I dared to disagree with him, so I agreed with everything he said because I knew what would happen if I didn't. If we had any problems it was always my fault. He told me if I would just do as I was told, his life would be perfect. He called me names. "Stupid" was his favourite. I have never been referred to as stupid in my entire life. I found out after we were married that he was addited to crack. He would stay out all night doing crack with his best friends wife. The best friend worked nights but he said his friend was ok with it. When I said I was going to speak to the "friend" about it he flew into a rage and again kicked me out of the house for not believing him. If there was something he wanted to do or purchase it didn't matter that I didn't agree, he would just bully me until I did agree. I truly believe his mother had a lot to do with this behavior. She is very much the same herself. His father is like I could see myself becoming. He was very submissive and was at her beck and call constantly. He never seemed to do anything to her satisfaction. I am now going through a very messy divorce, but I am so much more content living on my own. The breaking point was when he had hurt his hand and spent 6 weeks lying on the couch watching TV. I was lucky to be acknowledged by him. I was doing all the housework inside and out and all he did was lay there. When I told him that I was beginning to feel very lonely he became enraged and told me his was ignoring my on purpose because, same old story, I never let him do what he wanted. He screamed at me that night, called me names and sent a cup of coffee flying across the room. I sat there later thinking that if I took all the pills in the medicine cabinet I probably wouldn't be alive by morning. Then something in my mind clicked. I couldn't believe his behaviour had actually caused me to consider ending my life. I filed for divorce 2 days later and got out the house as soon as I could. I have never thought about suicide before so I felt I needed to get out because I feared for my life, not by his hand but by my own. Since I have left, which was about 3 month ago, I feel control coming back into my life again. To all those people out there living with someone like this. Don't let anyone tell you that you are not worthy of living.
    Reply to this
  • 10/29/2011 8:31 AM Eloise Beda wrote:
    An Abusive Mother’s hatred for her daughter is overwheming. This is killing the loving and caring Father. Her abusive nature has separated the Father from his Family. What scares me the most is..... that Her abusive nature is showing up in my young son’s personality.
    Reply to this
    1. 10/29/2011 2:45 PM marianne wrote:
      I'm sorry to hear that the trait is being recognized in your son. I had the same thing happen with my daughter. I ended up being sandwiched between an abusive mother and a narcissist daughter. My daughter showed some "odd" traits in her teens. Since then she has blown into a lying, malipulative,emotionally abusive woman. As much as it kills me, I have to keep my distance from her. But, she's not at all who I thought she was. So, believe it or not, it's really not that diffucult and I stay protected at all times.
      As far as the father in this dysfunctional family dynamic goes: He knows exactly what's going on but chooses not to do anything about it. Read what you can on " Enabling fathers". My father admitted to me that he knew my mother and brother were " abusing me for a long, long time". He also excused himself by saying he had to "watch out for himself" so it was okay and I should be understanding. Maybe you had a loving and caring father. But, how loving and caring could he be if he allowed others to abuse those or even one that he loved?
      Reply to this
  • 11/6/2011 4:13 AM Mary wrote:
    Has anyone done much on N mothers with many children? My mother had two daughters and five sons. I learned Mom was a N when my little sister gave me a book on Toxic Parenting. Blew me away. It's been years trying to deal with this. (She died 10 yrs ago) I was the s-goat and oldest of 7 kids in 9 yrs). What haunts me now is how fractured our family is. I've believed for years the younger ones escaped her malicious, misguided, desperate needs because I fought her (almost literally from the cradle) and spoke up for them and defended my dad. (They all blame dad by the way). But that "escape for sibs" was a myth I needed, I guess -- ex. my sister has an OCD son and bipolar daughter(coincidence?) and remains a staunch defender of M's goodness. One brother is OCD, and I suspect we all have quirks. I know conceptually M was badly damaged or she would not have been the "sweet" monster she was. But her death freed no one. So back, to the reason for my question --how do we heal? How can we be whole?
    OK -- how can I be whole? Thanks and God bless you all.

    PS -- anyonre out there have a Narcissistic meter? I can spot 'em a mile away! And they do seem drawn to me -- an attraction I really could do without!
    Reply to this
  • 11/17/2011 1:50 PM Jean wrote:
    I can describe the childhood spent near a narcissistic pervert mother. the word "near" i intently use. i always felt that i lived "near" my mother, not with her. sometimes i even lived for her. for a long time. i'm now in my early 30s i lived for her. i had to be the best; at school, in every activity. my permanent inner feeling is that of infinite coldness, no emotion. my permanent inner state is loneliness. core loneliness that goes with a feeling of strength though. everything is cerebral. during my childhood i developed a strong skill for the piano. i recently discovered that it served me to reconnect to a world of emotions and feelings i had no access to because my mother couldn't bring me to a world of feelings. feelings were dangerous: any manifestation of love was instantly deceived. traps and traps. we all have to have some feelings. my partner (i'm now in a relationship) told me i'm a strong person having survived what my mother emotionally did to me. she never liked me, she referred to me as a "mouche", in french a fly, with no other value than that of parasite. which i still feel i am. of course i can't love a woman. for a long time i felt i had no penis. she used to dress me as a girl because she wanted a girl (i was a deception for that to). i became a homosexual, as a rebellion against that terrible early figure of feminity, dangerous, treacherous and incestuous (incest that was not genitally acted i escaped psychosis). For a long time i suffered deep depression and couldn't go out, not knowing my identity (was I a boy or a girl?). in my childhood nighmares i saw her as a wolf. still, not a she-wolf that would protect her children but a wolf that would devour me while i would implore her no to eat me. my father was completely absent from the frame. later he compensated with money, bought me an apartment. he is a good man. did what he could. i love him now, when i was a child i hated him because she manipulated me to hate him (she hates males). i will always feel lonely. I will never have children. i'm a good man, i help others, friends who are lost in terrible past as i long was. I don't really hate her now, she is becoming more and more indifferent to me. but i know who she is, what kind of survival strategy she developed as a living creature. a few hours spent with her and i go crazy when i'm back home. ready to destroy anything around me, my actual relationship, that brings me so much, my friendships... she destroys anything. i can only say that it is possible to recover progressively your inner manhood, your sense of being a man. with words put on your sufferings. and a loving confident partnership. really There are wolves among us. my first relationship in this world was with one of them.
    Reply to this
  • 4/26/2012 6:50 PM ally wrote:
    I have just come to the conclusion that I have married a narcissist. Also, his two sons, ages 13 and 16, have this condition. Their biological mother has not been in the picture for 5+ years so they have been poisoned by their grandmother's condition as well. I actually can now understand why their mother left.
    At first our relationship was great. He moved about 150 miles from his mother to raise his kids with a good woman and her three kids. I am a teacher and am very involved in my community. My home has always been filled with kids. I welcomed his children to my home as did my children.
    Call me naive. I had no idea how one woman could destroy a family. From day one she insisted that her grandsons call her daily. She cried and guilted them about their happiness. I became the focus of her rage and she did everything to sabotage our marriage. Then she began working on the boys to carry out more schemes to discredit me. Often, she bribed them with gifts, money, and expensive clothing.
    She excluded me and my children from her family and when we did attend, we felt unwelcome.
    My husband was quick to defend her actions. Now that the boys are in their teens, she spoils them and encourages them to be disrespectful and rude to me.
    I am living in a toxic environment. My husband believes that it is all me. Although I love them, I am moving out.
    Reply to this
  • 9/26/2012 12:15 PM pete wrote:
    wow. what a post! i just recently had a problem with my 14 year old son and your description of him and his mom fit to the tee. we have been divorced 8 years and i did everything to keep him grounded. mom filed false claims of abuse and court gave me sole custody although we split time 50/50. since this summer son doesnt even want to have anything to do with me. mom has moved on to sugar daddy #3 lives in a mansion while i struggle to pay off the last custody battle living in 2 bedroom ranch. mind you husband #2 paid for custody battle and she got a huge settlement from me. any advice?
    Reply to this
Leave a comment

Submitted comments are subject to moderation before being displayed.

 Name

 Email (will not be published)

 Website

Your comment is 0 characters limited to 3000 characters.