Matriarchal-Patriarchal Narcissistic Lineage
As far as we know there isn't a narcissistic gene. Narcissists are not born; they are made---moment by moment from the time they are born. There are generations of families in which the female or male head of the family is a severe narcissistic personality disorder who dominates every family member. He or she is at the center of everyone's life. One matriarchal narcissist built a huge compound on her vast lands. Her estate home was surrounded by the houses of all her family members from children to great grandchildren. No one could run for the wire in fear of the sentries at the guard towers of her devastating power. Narcissists demand nothing less than your worship. If you are not sitting at their feet, waiting for orders or providing them with a waterfall of adulation, you are on their black list. Everyone reports to Big Mama or Big Daddy. Remember Big Daddy in Tennessee William's brilliant play: 'Cat On A Hot Tin Roof?' Played by Orson Welles, this larger than life figure, dictated the lives of all his family members, ruled with an iron fist, wrote their scripts, and threatened to destroy those who defied him. Big Daddy roared around, sticking his nose under everyone's tent, intruding on their most personal intimate matters. Everything, life itself, revolves around Big Momma and Big Daddy narcissists.
A narcissist will steal your soul if you let him or her. Growing up with narcissistic parents and the generations that came before them is a daunting task. I am in awe of those who not only survive this ordeal but the ones who become individuated, loving human beings, capable of psychological transparency, deep insight and human compassion. Visit my website:www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
email:lmlphd@gmail.com
A narcissist will steal your soul if you let him or her. Growing up with narcissistic parents and the generations that came before them is a daunting task. I am in awe of those who not only survive this ordeal but the ones who become individuated, loving human beings, capable of psychological transparency, deep insight and human compassion. Visit my website:www.thenarcissistinyourlife.com
Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D.
email:lmlphd@gmail.com
Posted by LindaMartinezLewi at 4/28/2009 10:32 AM 
Categories: self help, narcissism, mental health, interpersonal relationships
Tags: Big Moma and Big Daddy narcissists generations of narcissists
Categories: self help, narcissism, mental health, interpersonal relationships
Tags: Big Moma and Big Daddy narcissists generations of narcissists
My husband's mother is a severe Narcissist. She desires to rule the lives of all her children. My husband was her "special child". He is a full-blown narcissist, courtesy of his demonic mother. He mimics feelings, kindness and charm and I fell for it. He has a "goofy and innocent" lure, and to people who don't know him, he seems "laid-back" and "really cool". He is a heartless beast, in reality.
His mother has a public facade as a top-notch business woman. She once told me she has more power than the Mayor in our city (a major city). She said this with a straight face, and believes it. She is a beast. I have seen this side of her, and after 500 times of being burned, figured out that all things diabolical in this sick family stems from HER. She uses sex to "conquer" powerful men...often even the husbands of her friends without batting an eye. The friends wouldn't dream that she would do such a thing...though she has probably been doing this for YEARS.
The Generation of Narcissistic PDs became apparent to me when my husband's cruel mother paid a friend of his to ask me if my father (deceased) had ever "raped" me! I was livid, and couldn't believe he said this and I told him I knew who had put him up to saying something that cruel. He did not deny that it was my husband's vicious mother - that was enough for me to confirm it was her.
I then realized that this was HER HISTORY! That she was throwing onto me (that's what NPDs do). My Narcissistic Mother-in-law's father was a Pro-Athlete, who was full-of-himself. She told me once that he used to always call her his "pretty little girl" and tell her she was the "prettiest girl in the town"....I think there was something incestual going-on. She never even mentioned her father (deceased) other than these statements. She also lied to me, telling me that her father died when she was 13 (like mine). But, I recently found out that this woman was well into her 20s when her father died. Why lie?
Also my husband's NPD Mother was a promiscuous teenager (a tale-tale sign of sexual abuse). His mother (despite coming from a middle-class family had her 1st child at 16. She went on to college and even obtained a master's degree, but has always kept several "powerful" boyfriends for her toys, and has been married and divorced FOUR TIMES.
I think this woman's father was a Narcissist too. He created her by molesting her, etc. and she created my husband. I believe my husband's daugher is the "chosen granddaughter" by this woman. She worships this grandchild and never so much as mentions any of her other grandchildren, although they all live in the same city. It's a sick, evil cycle!
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